Hn7= 8/10 You started your 9th and last sentences with a small letter in your plot and also spelled the word realised wrong in your 8th sentence. You spelled finally wrong.
Saara= 5/10
You have many spelling mistakes and three grammar mistakes. Jerry's mother is not the main character. The last sentence in your plot has two spelling mistakes
Nomatter-Simon=4/10
Spelling mistakes (fist, swarm, swimm, overswarm). This is spoken language (althou, thou). Where did you read this (And when he bleed he dig a hole for the blood and pretent like he was not bleeding.). A sentence does not start with the word AND.
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